Access fight for our son is so bitter and ex won't let him attend his own baptism

DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex and I have been back and forth with the courts over access arrangements for our 18-month-old son.

Now he is refusing to rearrange one single date so my son can attend his baptism.

I wonder if I’m best off ignoring the court order.

We can’t communicate without it turning into a nasty argument, which is why it all has to be dealt with legally. I’m 37 and my ex is 34.

When we divorced, I moved 100 miles to be close to my family.

He knew I would be with my mum yet told the court he knew nothing and accused me of abduction.

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Now we have an arrangement where he has my son every other weekend.

Our son’s baptism has been organised for a date that falls on one of his weekends.

My ex won’t reschedule but this has taken a lot of preparation.

Do you think I should ignore the court order just this once?

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DEIDRE SAYS: Your ex has proved he is willing to make things as difficult as possible and you yourself have admitted you cannot communicate well.

Do not ignore the court order. You need some legal help with this.

If you are not in a position to talk to your solicitor, please contact Coram Children’s Legal Centre (, 01206 714 650).

Far better to rearrange the baptism, keeping your arrangements on an even keel.

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